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Open Poetry #8
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her silver pen, black book
| Open Poetry #8 |
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her silver pen, black book |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855
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Silent, softly swift and fleeting, Unbroken feelings torn and thrown. I was destroyed by love. Under the fall of a white pinnacle, Smoke rising from its inside ruin, I held a spider, waiting, weighing. For it to bite me, or move at all. But it was dead. The moon rose slowly; Put her white eye on us, a shadow. I cast the dead thing aside And sat under the white-mooned ruin, Waiting for myself to die. Then a friend opened her black book, Wrote me a poem on charcoal paper In the smooth filament of the moon. Silver ink against the black night. She spoke in her script. I felt healed. I was remade by love. |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Mike~ Yes ! !  'Then a friend opened her black book, Wrote me a poem on charcoal paper In the smooth filament of the moon. Silver ink against the black night. She spoke in her script. I felt healed. I was remade by love.' The magic of poetry ... gotta love it ! *deer* peeks at *squirrel* ~*Marge*~ ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~ noles1@totcon.com |
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ESP Member Elite
since 2000-01-25
Posts 2556Floating gently on a cloud.... |
Beautiful, Mike!!! Really lovely! Love and hugs, Lizzie  "Poetry is the true expression of my soul, it is my ultimate means of communication. It is my rainbow of delight." |
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INclan Senior Member
since 1999-07-20
Posts 1024Indiana, USA |
what an interesting thing, this LOVE. It can "destroy" and "remake" all in the same poem. Great writing my good man...... INclan |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
This was beautiful, with such a positive finale Mike! Oh to be "re-made" by love, like being born again ... excellent writing! Best wishes, /Kit |
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ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Beautiful ending Mike. The set up to the end is excellent. Very good! |
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Seymour Tabin Member Empyrean
since 1999-07-07
Posts 31720Tamarac Fla |
bsquirrel, Some wonderful lines, enjoyed the poem. |
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serenity blaze Member Empyrean
since 2000-02-02
Posts 27738 |
This is just beautiful...and I didn't think you could impress me any further than you already have... |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
I held a spider, waiting, weighing. For it to bite me, or move at all. But it was dead. The moon rose slowly; Put her white eye on us, a shadow. I cast the dead thing aside And sat under the white-mooned ruin, Waiting for myself to die. Then a friend opened her black book, Wrote me a poem on charcoal paper In the smooth filament of the moon. Silver ink against the black night. She spoke in her script. I felt healed. I was remade by love. ----------------- and i do so love you-in-love  keep em coming ... me feels wings sprouting ... awesome poem Mike...awesome later-love-poet-gator jm What the caterpillar calls the end ... The world calls a butterfly ~LaoTzeTao~ ~Butterflies are meant to be free~ |
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SEA
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
Mike~ this is wonderful. It left me wanting more.... -SEALive,Love,Laugh :) ~SueB |
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Martie
Moderator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-09-21
Posts 28049California |
What a wonderful love story...love the thought and the beauty of how you write! |
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Meadowmuse Member Elite
since 1999-12-27
Posts 3263 |
I enjoyed the softness and reflective quality of this piece, Mike, and of course the allusion to the power of the pen. ~ Claire Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other's eyes for an instant?......Henry David Thoreau |
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redheart angrybraids Member
since 2000-04-16
Posts 410honolulu, hawaii |
i was glad i read this tranquil poem, i was pleasntly assured of the pen and paper, i just love the title, Kindly, Redheart Angrybraids |
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mariee66 Senior Member
since 2000-01-30
Posts 596Recess, OfYourMind |
Loved how this all came together--love destroyed then reborn...it was great! Marie~ |
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bsquirrel
since 2000-01-03
Posts 7855 |
WOW! I had no idea this poem would garner so many fans (is garner even the right word?). I wrote this after a friend told me about how when she feels down, she writes in a notebook of black paper; inks her thoughts in silver pen. That immediately made me think of the moon and the night, and the dual destruction/rebirth of nature. Thank you all for enjoying this so much. I didn't realize what i had here -- I'm going to post this in Voices. Thanks again!Mike P.S., Butterfly Slippers and S'en, send me an 'e' sometime! |
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