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Open Poetry #9
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DiscordantNote
New Member
since 2000-08-01
Posts 9
Texas

0 posted 2000-08-01 02:21 AM


Could you tell me that you love me?
Even if it isn’t true...
Could you let me kiss you one more time,
The way you used to do?

Could we sit out in the old porch swing,
And watch the sun go down?
Would you smile for just a little while,
Instead of wear a frown?

Then I’ll pack my battered suitcase-
And take my blanket roll-
Out from behind the sofa...
Where I stashed it years ago.

I’ll walk on out of your life-
The way I once walked in...
Even though you do not love me,
Could we just this time pretend?
< !signature-->

"Things get complicated when you get past eighteen, and the further past eighteen you get... the more complicated they become".

[This message has been edited by DiscordantNote (edited 08-01-2000).]

© Copyright 2000 John Buchanan - All Rights Reserved
Gossamerwings
Member
since 2000-07-18
Posts 207

1 posted 2000-08-01 02:29 AM


Oh this is sweet, but sad!

Nice writing.

WELCOME to passions!  


Gossamerwings

Rosebud1229
Senior Member
since 2000-04-05
Posts 1813
North Carolina
2 posted 2000-08-02 01:12 AM


very beautiful poem, sometimes we would all like to pretend but just for a moment.
MMoonchild
Senior Member
since 2000-07-13
Posts 1715
PA
3 posted 2000-08-02 01:15 AM


smooth rhythm and rhyme...enjoyed
~~soft smiles
Maureen

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
4 posted 2000-08-02 01:15 AM


Welcome to the family! I like this..and will certainly watch for more of your work!  

Please check your email for a special message.

Paula Finn
Member Ascendant
since 2000-06-17
Posts 5546
missouri
5 posted 2000-08-02 01:16 AM


Tears for this one...so sad...id like to see you submit this for the book

never say never

JulieAnn
Senior Member
since 2000-06-12
Posts 754
Earth 3rd Rock from the sun!!
6 posted 2000-08-02 01:40 AM


I like it~~~~~~ Oh and welcome to passions.... a truely wonderful site!!!  

Julie :)



Jenn E
Senior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 589
Kelowna, BC, Canada
7 posted 2000-08-02 02:11 AM


Sometimes it's easier to just pretend......if only for a moment.
Enjoyed the read.
Jenn

ethome
Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858
New Brunswick Canada
8 posted 2000-08-02 02:30 AM


Strange how such a fire can go out and no one can explain why......so those reflections on the good times become the strongest thing in a relationship....well written and welcome to Passions

take care......ethome..

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
9 posted 2000-08-02 07:49 AM


DiscordantNote~

While I may disagree with the 'pretending'...
I did enjoy your view on it.

'I’ll walk on out of your life-
The way I once walked in...'

I found this to be a great line.

Welcome to the family !
~*Marge*~


~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


notlikely2
Member
since 2000-06-16
Posts 308
UK
10 posted 2000-08-02 07:53 AM


I guess all of us want to pretend at some time in our lives.
Maybe it can help.
Maybe.
I hope you mend quickly though, in case it doesn't.

Jenova
Junior Member
since 2000-08-02
Posts 16
germany
11 posted 2000-08-02 07:57 AM


God, I know this feeling... and I liked how you expressed it... nice floating, btw! =)I'd like to see some more of you!

WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
12 posted 2000-08-02 11:42 PM


Pretending just isn't worth it, but I can sure relate to what you're saying here.
This was a great poem, though sad. I hope things work out!!

Oh, and WELCOME TO PASSIONS!

<*\\\><

The will of God will never lead you, where the grace of God cannot keep you.


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