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Open Poetry #6
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Nicole
Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835
Florida

0 posted 2000-03-30 06:13 PM


A snow storm rages across the lands
A blizzard in hues of whites and blues
No life can survive this storm’s rough hands
Gripping and tearing – shredding – all within view
Barren and cold lie miles of death
As far as the eye can see, then that much more
Impossible to encompass the very breadth
Of vitality once felt, and loved, now deplored

The storm rages on ‘round a fortress made of steel
Forged and cast in Hell, each brick carefully laid
Bells toll an eternity in melancholy peals
Giving voice to all things dead – unswayed
No windows cut, no doors lead in or out
Walls a’bastioned scrape the bruised, black sky
Around each tower, wraithlike clouds writhe about
As the solitary clogs of time clunk slowly by

Breaking through the clouds with a deafening roar
Shines a beam of light to rival a hundred suns
Its warmth spreading, caressing – melting the storm
A spring-like breeze healing all hurt – all shunned
Walls a’ bastioned come crashing to the ground
Through clearing dust, center-most, can be seen a hole
In the earth that holds a heart now unbound
Because you reached out tenderly – and touched my soul.



 May I never be too busy to help another's load,
Then I'll be drinking from the saucer 'cause my cup has overflowed.

--Author Unknown

© Copyright 2000 Nicole Williams - All Rights Reserved
CherylLynnMckee
Member
since 2000-03-28
Posts 215

1 posted 2000-03-30 06:17 PM


Lovely poem..well written..enjoyed it much.

 

Local Rebel
Member Ascendant
since 1999-12-21
Posts 5767
Southern Abstentia
2 posted 2000-03-30 06:20 PM


Wow , such violent vivid imagery!  I think you captured the intensity of the wrath and the healing...

reminds me once again og Gibran's prophet

'the deeper sorrow carves into our souls the more joy we may contain'

Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
3 posted 2000-03-31 12:43 PM


Oh, this is good! I love it....I can see that old heart melting now...  
Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
4 posted 2000-03-31 12:51 PM


Satiate~
Nothing calms the storms like a tender touch.

'Because you reached out tenderly – and touched my soul.'

Beautifully done.
~*Marge*~


 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com


Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
5 posted 2000-03-31 02:10 AM


Beautiful poem, satiate.  Great imagery...  I can relate well to the new found warmth and the crashing of the walls around you.  The ending nearly got a tear out of me... Loved it!

Michael

Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505
Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA
6 posted 2000-03-31 02:15 AM


Imagery second to none, Satiate. The storm, the fortress and the appearance of hope and deliverance...this poem has it all, Well done.
Nicole
Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835
Florida
7 posted 2000-03-31 10:54 AM


CLM:  Thank you!

LR: Coming from the imagery king, that is quite a compliment...thankee kindly, sir.  Wise words too, but sometimes we're left wondering if there is enough joy to fill such great carves. Yanno?

PdV: Hey...are you trying to tell me I'm old?!  hehe    I'll attribute this old heart melting to the Spring weather outside!

Marge:  You said it true, dear.  Nothing indeed.

Michael, seems we relate well to a lot of things...prolly why we're friends!   Hey, and no tearing up...this is a happy poem!

Balladeer, Thank you very much, your compliments always leave me blushing! lol  

Danny Holloway
Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034
Tulsa, OK
8 posted 2000-03-31 12:33 PM


Please let me echo the nice comments already expressed.
Very nice writing!

hoot_owl_rn
Member Patricius
since 1999-07-05
Posts 10750
Glen Hope, PA USA
9 posted 2000-04-01 10:19 AM


Beautiful  
Alicat
Member Elite
since 1999-05-23
Posts 4094
Coastal Texas
10 posted 2000-04-03 09:14 PM


Satiate, you astound me.  Perhaps, if you can get past the logical lumberjack inside, you should let the Muse breathe a bit more freely, for, by this example, you have shown once more what a simple breath can do.  

Perhaps soon, if you happen to be inflicted with insomnia, we could meet for coffee and chat freely once more.  

Alicat the Persnikitty

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