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Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California

0 posted 2000-04-22 07:58 AM


WALLS

I remember so clearly how it started.  A young man, maybe 40, on fire for the Lord.  Every Sunday, from the back of his pickup truck off the side of old Highway 58, he'd go to preaching.  He wasn't ordained of the ministry, but he was ordained of God.  Oh, how the Holy Spirit flowed through him.  I remember so clearly how he took time out to talk with everyone who showed up.

People came to hear him.  More and more, every Sunday.  People from miles around.  Soon he was preaching in a tent, with folding chairs set up for the onlookers.  I was only a child, 9, maybe 10, but I understood everything going on there.  It was there, I was first introduced to Jesus.  Everyone who showed up knew each other, every one stayed after the service to fellowship with each other.  And always, the presence of God was amongst us.

Time brought growth, and change.  The minister soon "had" to be ordained, so he took his appropriate measures.  The tent wasn't considered feasible, soon it was abandoned all together and the services were taking place in people's homes while a small church building was being built.  Almost as soon as it was completed, the congregation seemed to outgrow it, and the start of another building was taking place.  The beginning of a cycle.

Somewhere down the road, I found myself in a huge building of marble and stone.  Rows and rows of beautifully stained walnut pews, magical window displays and red carpet rolling up to a glamourous altar which lay before this church of thousands.  Thousands, and yet I was alone.  Oh sure, I shook hands with someone every week, told them I loved them in the Lord, and yet today, I can't recall a name.  So many people, yet who amongst them had time to stay for fellowship?  Who there saw me slipping away?

Every week the sermons took longer, seemed to grow lifeless.  Something was missing.  So much focus on the collection, the bills that had to be paid.  Funds had to be raised for this, for that.  The preacher never had time to see you anymore at all.  Every week was a race out of the parking lot... Run home, put the Sunday suit, (and demeanor), up till next week.  Hoping when the phone rang it wasn't John or Bill calling to tell you the latest church gossip, or worse, someone wanting you to give personal time to a church project.  I remember distinctly the day I realized I dreaded the thought of going to church.  How could this come about?  Just tell me how?  I was a member of one of the most prominent churches in my area, yet what did that mean?  Nothing.   Soon, I just gave up on church all together.  

Tomorrow will be Easter, and like so many other backslidden, lukewarm Christians I will yet walk into a church building and listen to a sermon, probably not much different than the one I heard last Easter.  The one that had me coming back for a month or so, until the fire burned out.  Once again, I will look around at the walls, the pews, the carpets.  Once again, I will shake hands with strangers.  Once again, I'll think back to when sermons were so filled with passion, and the brushing of angels' wings were so prevalent in a church that had no walls, no glamour, not even an ordained minister, and once again, I will wonder if that exist anymore.

I ask you today, where can I find God.  Is the church spoken of in the bible a building?  Or is the church the following of Christ, those who accept Him as Lord and savior.  Why do I feel so compelled to take my walk with Christ alone?

Michael Anderson

4/22/2000

© Copyright 2000 Michael Anderson - All Rights Reserved
ellie LeJeune
Member Elite
since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156
King of Prussia, PA USA
1 posted 2000-04-22 08:31 AM


Dear Michael; I can identify with what you are saying here. I have found my church to be be very impersonal and lukewarm. I wish I had an answer, but I don't. I have found more fellowship and real christians here at this forum than in my church. This fact is a beautiful blessing and a sad commentary. Thanks for posting this. I feel less alone in my love for Jesus. Happy Easter! Ellie

 02



Munda
Member Elite
since 1999-10-08
Posts 3544
The Hague, The Netherlands
2 posted 2000-04-22 09:14 AM


Micheal, there's not much I can say about belonging to a church, as I have no bond with any church, but I do know one thing: God is found from within and once you've found Him, nothing can take Him away. If you find along your way people you can share this with, you're lucky.   Just my 2 cents.  
Excellent writing here my friend !

deleeme
Senior Member
since 1999-10-09
Posts 1766
NEW ENGLAND, USA
3 posted 2000-04-22 09:39 AM


Michael,
  I admire your open candor, and am saddened by your experience- for I know that it happens too often -as you have described.
The burning fire of the Gospel so often gives way to the status quo- and we get settled into a form without substance, as Paul spoke of,"having a form of Godliness, but denying the Power thereof."
My Friend continue to seek your Spiritual fire & fervor--and maybe you may be more like that man at the beginning of your story
Who trully had and shared the Love of God in a meaningful & caring way with others-no matter what.  God bless you,  David

Marge Tindal
Deputy Moderator 5 ToursDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384
Florida's Foreverly Shores
4 posted 2000-04-22 09:43 AM


Michael~
I read this with much interest in your thoughts.

I find that the 'church' is within me.
When I was more youthful, I also had that 'fire' of desire that came from knowing the spirit of Christianity within me.

Sometimes I felt it burn down .. but never out.  I realized it was up to me to keep pace with the work of the Master.
If I wanted to share in the warmth of ministry, I had to add my 'wood' to the fire.  And I found that it was accomplished when I gave of myself to God and to others.

I give of myself to the work of the Lord without asking what I'm getting out of it.
Believing in His word that my rewards will come inside the gates of Heaven makes it possible for me to continue His way.

A gentleman that I used to work with had a saying .. 'Plan your work.  Then work your plan.'  I think he wouldn't mind me changing it a little to reflect how I look at doing God's work.  'Plan your work.  Then work God's plan.'

Look around and ask yourself what you've 'given' and I think you will see that is what matters most.
Your walk with God is never alone.
It's up to you to spread the joy.
The 'walls' are not confining when you
take your love of Him beyond the 'walls'
of the church building and into the hearts
of others.  Reach out and touch someone
with your love of Him.
Wear your 'Sunday suit' everyday,
in all you do.
Add your 'wood' to the fire so that it
burns brighter and warms those around you.

Love to you, Michael.
~*Marge*~



 ~*The pen of the poet never runs out of ink, as long as we breathe.*~
noles1@totcon.com



Poet deVine
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-26
Posts 22612
Hurricane Alley
5 posted 2000-04-22 10:18 AM


I'm so glad you pointed me to this, my friend. My experience is somewhat similiar. Let me say from the beginning that this story is wonderful..I can feel you in it.

I believe that God is in us. WE are his church...if our bodies are temples therefore, doesn't that mean that we are the 'house of the Lord'? A building cannot be His house for He lives in us!

Years ago, I was very active in my church. My kids went to Sunday School, I taught 5 years there, I also worked with young girls in a Missionary group and I worked with our Senior Citizens..a Women's Missionary Group and the monthly Senior Citizen dinner (I planned them, served them and did all the decorations). I typed letters for the Pastor, ran off the Sunday bulletin and did a lot of little things (landscaping type things). After awhile, there was a rift in the church..I began to see these so-called Christians differently. What they professed on Sunday, didn't last through Tuesday... I was filled with sorrow...worshipping God should have been the focus here and it wasn't..

I began getting migraines. And after one final, blinding migraine that left me unable to even drive the 2 miles to my home, I realized that I had let the petty people problems get in the way of my faith! An so, I stayed away.

My relationship with God is much deeper. I don't have to attend only one Sunday Service (I will not say 'church'). I can meet many people who touch my life! Or I can take a walk on Sunday morning and meet Him everywhere...HE is the head of my church...I am His church...

WhtDove
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245
Illinois
6 posted 2000-04-22 12:01 PM


Michael you've written a great piece here. I don't attend church anymore. It needs not be in a building. The true church is the body of Christ!

"The kingdom of God is within you"...that is the King and his dominion!

I too when in Colorado saw what I say as fake Christians. One's who thought because you believed in God you had to be bubbly and happy all the time or you didn't have him.
That's just not so.

All have backsliden at one time or another, even the disciples of Jesus did. They seem to throw you out for one thing or another. But let me tell you, the church building should be for sinners, for Jesus came to the "lost" not the righteous.

You know I could go on and on about this. Michael what I've done, is study at home for years with a Pastor, and I've learned that way. One who actually teaches the Word, verse by verse and chapter by chapter! I can't say I've found that in any other church I've attended.

You find God within you Michael, by reading His Word, by doing His will, that will strengthen your walk with Him!
I've often felt I was walking alone. Thank God, my husband was there and believed also.
It's not always easy, Elijah felt he was alone too, the last one left.

You know if there's anything I can do to help you, that I'm there. Better if there are two, when one falls, they can help the other up.

God bless you Michael, you're in my prayers!

Songbird
Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184
Missouri
7 posted 2000-04-22 12:56 PM


Very honest and well written account of your personal experience. I understand the concerns voiced here, yet I personally feel even in spite of the frailities of the church in general, where would we be without it? Kind of like a country without a government, or a community without a school. Just because some churches are not up to God's standards they are still benifiting the society yet maybe they could be doing that even more so if we who know what the real church is would attend and spread the love of God to those who are seeking. I have moved alot over the years and visited alot of churches seeking the right one in which to bring my children up in, and I know that there are some really good churches but you have to look and be patient for God's direction. I too remember the camp meetings and cottage prayer meetings, perhaps that is the answer for some, hold church in your home, the bible does say not to forget to assemble yourselves together for that is a source of strength in your Christian walk.
Nan
Administrator
Member Seraphic
since 1999-05-20
Posts 21191
Cape Cod Massachusetts USA
8 posted 2000-04-22 01:03 PM


Michael, this is a pretty poignant story... It's one that many can certainly relate to.  How do we find our way back to the "basics"... Perhaps that's a question we could explore..

It's always a pleasure to read your work, my friend..

Irish Rose
Member Patricius
since 2000-04-06
Posts 10263

9 posted 2000-04-23 01:21 AM


I waited there one Sunday until the end of the service and they called everyone to the front. I stood there hurting, and feeling so frail and human and full of disappointment in myself. No one touched me, no one prayed with me, no one noticed me. So I ran out of the church and I've never been back. This could have been a fluke, nothing personal with me, and I know God is real, I know that. But I wanted a human touch, from others who should have given it.
I walked in alone, I stood alone, and I left alone or did I? The building is still there, it's beautiful you know, lots of people attend, and I wonder if anyone, anyone at all remembers me leaving that day, or how I felt and how I cried.
Then I remembered the agony in the garden and how no one was there, no one prayed with him, no one touched him, and no one stayed with him. Not one hour would they even give him.
I just remember that and I relate to him, knowing he was without the building, without the people and he still endured.

 Kathleen


Nicole
Senior Member
since 1999-06-23
Posts 1835
Florida
10 posted 2000-04-23 11:29 AM


Michael, dear...everyone else has said what I wanted to say, and they've done a much better job than I ever could.

God is inside you, and I know you can feel that.  I believe that the Church is the following of Christ, but also believe that it is important for all our brothers and sisters to travel together. We need our fellowship, true fellowship...our Church 'home'. They are out there, the world is full of people who worship in true fellowship with one another.  That celebrate God, together, with their earthly family.  I think that in going through our lives, the mundane and the troubles...all of it weighs upon our shoulders, and gradually we forget to look skyward.  We plod along our paths with our heads cast down, during a time when we should be looking up to God and reaching out most.  During those times, I also think we're so intent on the path we're walking that we don't see all the brothers and sisters around us, walking their own paths.  All it takes is an outstretched hand...

You know me, Michael...you know how I think and what I feel, and writing this down was difficult for me just in that I'm looking myself.  I'm afraid that in the process of getting my thoughts to keyboard, they've gone and jumbled on me...  

I love you my precious friend, and my hand is always outstretched to you.

~N

Michael
Moderator
Member Rara Avis
since 1999-08-13
Posts 7666
California
11 posted 2000-04-24 02:21 AM


There was much that lead me to write this piece.  I think the biggest thing was Jesus' direct commandment to all of us, "Love one another, even as I have loved you."  Something I've seen so lost upon seeking a church to fellowship in today.  

I believe the bible tells us we are to fellowship together, and help out fallen brethren.  ellie speaks my opinion there,too, in that when I have fallen, I have received more help from members of this forum than anyone I actually know in the town I live in.  I think of this forum as a blessing, but I also feel a sadness that such is the case concerning my friends and relatives here.

Again, I think back to Christ speaking to Peter, "Feed my sheep."
if the only ones being fed are the one's who know where the flock gathers, what happens to the lost ones?  I know I have fallen more than my share of times.  I know I have struggled to get up many many times and have had not but God to help me.  Which is all I really need, granted.  But what of one struggling who has not met God?  If we are not reaching out to our own brethren, what chance does he have?

Should he make it to a church building, how is he being treated?  It was easy for me to give my life to Christ when love seemed so prevalent in the church.  But that love seems so lost to me today.

I wish to thank each and all of you for your comments and opinions and for the very valid points made here.  Marge, I like the plan much better with God involved!


Sincerely,

Michael



[This message has been edited by Michael (edited 04-24-2000).]

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