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ellie LeJeune
Member Elite

since 2000-01-10

Posts 4156
King of Prussia, PA USA

0 posted 2000-02-04 09:09 AM

Now that my little girl inside,
is feeling safe and secure in
     the arms of God,
Who is constantly full of
     surprises!
What should be the first
     discovery,
but, buckets and buckets
     of anger,
     reams of rage.
Who should be the one
the anger was directed at,
     but God Himself.
Once the fear was gone,
Honesty took charge.
     My own truth,
        finally!
Finally able to tell Him
     how angry I am,
        with Him.
All those times I felt
        so alone.
Felt as if everything were
        up to me,
with no one on my side.
How could He let my baby die!
And another child in a
         mental home,
and on and on.
All that suffering and pain.
But then I could see the
         gifts.
His Gifts as I could hear
         Him say,
"I can handle your anger at Me".
I made the sun and the moon.
Created the mountains and
         streams.
Set all the stars in place.
Now I want to take care
         of you.
I'll be in control and take all
the burdens from you.
You really can let go of it
         all now,
and learn to trust in
      My Love for you.
"come to believe", one day at a time,
that I, the creator of all things,
can restore you to sanity.
Give back to all that was lost.
And give you more than you
     ever dreamed of.
I only need your willing
     heart.
I want to free you to be
     who you were meant to be.
Free you to dream your dreams,
     so I can make them
         all come true.
Yes, you'll have bad days.
For there are many lessons
         to learn.
But deep inside I will give
        my gift of peace.
That will grow stronger
        day by day.
And day by day, you will
        grow,
into the beautiful woman
I created you to be.

Together we will live and
        love.
Sharing that Love with others.
Using the gifts I gave you,
        to strengthen others,
that they might come to trust
        in me.
And know the happiness and joy
        I give to you.

02

Willem
Member

since 1999-11-18

Posts 139
Inverness, FL, USA

1 posted 2000-02-04 03:24 PM

Ellie,  this again is one piece of truly
magnificent poetry, such as we've come to expect from you. Someone once wrote "on the internet you learn to know new friends from the inside out", which I found out to be really true on this particular forum. So let's all try to keep it that way by giving
God all the honor for our talents.  May I send my granddaughters copies of your poems?
One of them is practice-teaching English at
a middle school and she might even want to join our forum. She is a good girl and a real Christian.

Willem

Janet Marie
Member Laureate

since 2000-01-22

Posts 18554

2 posted 2000-02-04 05:05 PM

Ellie, this is AMAZING!!!!!!
sometimes when our lives get hard and confusing...we do feel so much anger and doubt...and we can become overwhelmed by our problems and the problems of the world as well...but we can recover our strength and calm our anger when we trust our faith and comfort ourselves in Gods love.
This poem is a lovley reminder of his grace.
I am so impressed with this...is this something you wrote recently? thank you for sharing it.

take care Janet Marie

Some things cannot be explained by verses that rhyme,
They are not measured by the commitment of time.
Some emotions run too deep to be described by words,
Forgiveness and understanding-
remain the most beautiful words ever heard.
Janet Marie

WhtDove
Member Rara Avis

since 1999-07-22

Posts 9245
Illinois

3 posted 2000-02-04 10:04 PM

Was this ever written from the heart. You know, I feel so bad for all that you've gone through and I know it cannot be easy for you!
Though to be angry with God I guess in those situations, we tend to do. Though it was not God that caused it. Things happen for many reasons, and we can't forget the world, and the things that are in it also. Good comes from God! I once I heard it said, that when an infant doesn't make into this world, that they're are just to special to have to go through it. I have never looked at it the same since. God is a loving God, and I know you know that. He would never do anything to us to cause us pain, by taking something from us. I mean sure he corrects us, only to get us back on the path. I guess I should quit rambling now, just remember, ALL good comes from God!

God bless you, and I hope your feeling better! I'm glad to see you write about how you're feeling! You've done an excellent job!

<*\\\><

When you can't make up your mind
Which way is right for you,
Stop and softly ask yourself,
What Would Jesus Do?

Songbird
Member Elite

since 1999-12-15

Posts 2184
Missouri

4 posted 2000-02-05 12:36 PM

Ellie, you are so honest, and that is what one of the things I like about your poetry. Why should it be so shocking to anyone, that you could be angry at God? We are human after all, and if we are feeling alone, abandoned, and hurt and we are taught that God loves us, why wouldn't we feel angry after all we are emotional beings. It is not the emotions that are wrong but the actions that might result from those emotions if we choose to also hurt someone else or sin again God. I once heard someone say, God is a big God, he can handle our anger at him, and he loves us just the same. That is why he is so wonderful he loves us in spite of our weaknesses, just like we as parents love our children in spike of the mean things they might say to us. God's got big shoulders, I for one need to lean on them more. I think I feel a poem coming on!! LOL Thanks for sharing with us.

deleeme
Senior Member

since 1999-10-09

Posts 1766
NEW ENGLAND, USA

5 posted 2000-02-05 07:51 AM

Oh Dear Ellie, How eloquently you share God's Voice, though borne out of anger, heartbreak & loss, until you found the wonderful Love & provisions of such a loving and powerful God. And may I say, you are also doing a marvelous job of fulfilling your mission of sharing that love & using your gifts to help others, for God's glory.
Thank you for rendering such a precious service, David

"Our Creativity points to a Higher Creator--we couldn't have just happened, and for what ability we may possess--to God be the glory." -dlw-

sandgrain
Member Elite

since 1999-09-21

Posts 3662
Sycamore, IL, USA

6 posted 2000-02-05 07:55 PM

I love the outpouring of the soul entwined in human emotion. So happy you are being restored from your hurts...they are deep ones, but you must be quite a person as God never gives more than we can handle.

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