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Teen Poetry #2
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What is IT?
| Teen Poetry #2 |
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What is IT? |
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faith Member
since 2000-01-31
Posts 89 |
It passes by me a question in the air, So soft and cool, I can feel it on my face, It's a mystery maybe , I don't know what it is. For me it's a touch , everywhere it lives, It breathes me at night , when I m deep in my sleep, Waking me up from the sweetest of dreams. It could be my summer, it could be my rain, 'Could be a sweet gush of wind , or maybe its my pain, At night I can feel it lingering at my window, Forces pull me towards its mystic glow, I talk to it for hours to come, A memory it becomes when I feel the sun, Days go by , but nights are the same. Maybe its my summer or maybe its my pain! |
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| © Copyright 2000 faith - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Danny Holloway Member Elite
since 2000-01-15
Posts 2034Tulsa, OK |
Excellent! A fine poetic style I think. You are a fine writer! I hope it's your summer, and not your pain. |
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Paul Hoekman Member
since 1999-12-28
Posts 382Harwinton Ct. U>S>A> |
Really Wonderful! So very deep yet so very simple Keep On Writing. |
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poetry_kills Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549new orleans |
faith: i like the repeated line a lot... very well-crafted... i think the poem loses a lot of its early tightness as you head into the second part, but other than that i think it's very well done sincerely, jerome the mysterious priest And their bleating was like a wet salmon slapped upon the land---slap! slap! slap! |
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