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Critical Analysis #1
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Two in the Morning (just for fun)
| Critical Analysis #1 |
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Two in the Morning (just for fun) |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563
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It's two in the morning, sleep evades, Shadowy walls shift in dim light, The smell of betadine pervades, The monkey grabs and holds on tight. Two odd appendages, one on each side, Accompany me on my walk, One hidden under a coat, the other I guide, Not one person to whom I could talk. An empty hall, then the front door, Which opens wide for me, As I enter into the air, I soar, Indulging in two, no, maybe three. A bit woozy, feeling tired, The bed beckons me once more, Time to climb back over the barbedwire, But someone's locked the door! The tall windows reveal a gal inside, I wave so I'll surely be noticed, She sees me, but looks stupified, I point to the bracelet on my wrist. Just then a guard walks down the hall, She calls him over, points me out, "Hey I'm fighting off this Demerol, C'mon you morons", I want to shout. He saunters over to the door, and click, It's open. I drag my slim friend, Towards the door, across the brick, He reaches out, a hand to lend. I told him why, as we three headed to, Where I should have been all along, "Next time, go out back". He understood, I didn't feel I'd been so wrong. I entered the room so quietly, Damn, she was there awaiting, "Where have you been?!!, she scolded me, "They'll again be operating!" warmhrt |
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| © Copyright 2000 warmhrt - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Hawk183 Member
since 1999-12-24
Posts 130 |
Warmhrt, You set the scene very well. I really like the first and fourth stanzas...the whole poem flows nicely. Thanks for the interesting read. Hawk |
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jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
WH: I get the picture but not the point. In other words, yes, you set the scene well but, no, I don't understand what's being said. Maybe I am just guilty of another Jim-Must-Find-Meaning-In-Everything neurosis (I know that term is antiquated) or perhaps the related, but distinct, Jim's-Dense-in-the-Head-itus. Either way, explanations please?  Jim "If I rest, I rust." - Martin Luther |
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Ophelia Junior Member
since 2000-01-12
Posts 19 |
Warmhrt: I enjoyed this read, thought it was like walking through a broken dream... but not a good dream. The scene is set, then changes like when a person can't remember the dreams they had the night before. I really enjoy your poetry! Ophelia |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Hawk and Ophelia, Thanks for reading, and glad you enjoyed. Jim, Jim, Jim,teacher, Did you read the title? This is just a little story about what happened to me Monday night in the hospital...the lengths us smokers have to go to indulge our terrible habit, and what can happen if one does decide to give in to that habit. That's all...a simple tale. Your turn to do a few laps.  warmhrt [This message has been edited by warmhrt (edited 01-12-2000).] |
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jbouder Member Elite
since 1999-09-18
Posts 2534Whole Sort Of Genl Mish Mash |
Thanks WH. I was beginning to think the "fun" in "just for fun" was watching poor old Jim pull his hair out trying to figure this one out. Whew! I guess I'm not losing my mind. I guess I have some laps to run now ... be back in a bit (*Jim sprints out his cubicle and down the hall of his office building). |
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poetry_kills Senior Member
since 1999-12-04
Posts 549new orleans |
i like this one, though after a second reading i'm not so sure i really know what it's about anymore ^_^*... half-way through the thing (i think it was the barbed wire and guards) had me thinking it was someone attempting escape (while drugged) from an asylum, then the second half made me think it was a hospital patient, but now i've gone and confused myself and dont have a clue what it is anymore. :\ mabye you can help clear up my flustered feeble mind. *heh* --jerome the boy with no brain |
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warmhrt Senior Member
since 1999-12-18
Posts 1563 |
Jerome, I had surgery last Monday, and felt imprisoned, since I could not smoke anywhere except outside. I did sneak out, but coudn't get back in(the door automatically locked at 9:00PM). I would've had to go all the way around the hospital to the emergency entrance. They do have security guards in hospitals, and one let me in, and escorted me to my room. The nurse was inside, and quite upset with me, since I was supposed to be taking it very easy. Clear it up? Hope so. Jim,teach, Outta breath? If not, you've got a few more to do. glasshoppa |
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