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Open Poetry #46
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....In the Basement !
| Open Poetry #46 |
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....In the Basement ! |
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Namyh Senior Member
since 2009-01-20
Posts 988 |
...In the Basement I've seen Fear on the face of men in war, that wide-eyed riveted gaze. On mine in front of a foe with a gun who intended to extinquish my days. But nothing would ever prepare me for this tale I'm compulsed to present 'bout hauling wet clothes to a dryer downstairs in my buddy's basement. First the lights went out. I dropped the load. The basement silence held two sounds like knives slicing air in the distance and thudding feet walking soft ground. I lunged for the stairway in darkness but the Thing scraped my ribcage so ! At the top of the stairs, I could just see the door, only seven steps to go. Its breath singed the hairs on the back of my neck. I jumped two steps, leaving five. I bounded two more and that left me three with the Monster on my heels and alive. I lunged for the door, ope' and closed it. All in one motion I did ! It snarled and pounded and pounded. My escape must have blown its lid. Each pounding lifted me off the door. Cracked wood pieces propelled to the floor. Ejected like bullets were door hinge screws. Wood began crumbling. It was coming through ! I shivered and sweated in silent fright. Awaiting the crash ! Awaiting the fight ! Then suddenly ! All went silent ! And again my ears heard the sound. Knifeclaws, slicing air in the distance, started fading and melting, going down. The breath returned to my body and the sweat began to dry. Why it stopped? I'll never know. I'm lucky and I won't ask why ! When I told my vacationing buddy, he chuckled and said I was crazed. But I saw him back home from vacation today with his "wide-eyed riveted gaze." So, don't laugh at anyone saying, "There's a Monster in your basement, my friend." You can bet your sweet life, I would never forget it or ever chuckle again ! Namyh |
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| © Copyright 2010 Namyh - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Robert E. Jordan Member Rara Avis
since 2008-01-25
Posts 8541Philadelphia, Pennsylvania |
Yo dear Namyh, this is extremely well written, with expert rhyme and rhythem. That probably explains why no one has commented on it. I've had dreams like that, but my basement is safe. Love Bobby |
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Namyh Senior Member
since 2009-01-20
Posts 988 |
Bobby – You should have seen the rewrites. It took time to get the rhyme and rhythm just right. Your wonderful words of enjoyment say it was worth it. I guess we’ve all had dreams like that. So very happy your basement is safe. Thanks Bobby. Namyh |
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latearrival Member Ascendant
since 2003-03-21
Posts 5499Florida |
I Read it holding my breath. It sounded a wee bit unbelievable but I read it with anticipation any way. You got me good. Loved it. latearrival |
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Namyh Senior Member
since 2009-01-20
Posts 988 |
latearrival – Thanks for your optimal compliment. I wrote this with the hope that one breath would be held reading it. I guess you’re it and I thank you for confirming that it was all worth it. And I would say also that you are right on time Latearrival. Namyh |
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Andrew Scott Member Elite
since 1999-06-24
Posts 2558Redlands,CA,USA |
I read this with the view of a returning vet dealing with the effects of shell sock... the war demon that suddenly comes up from the depths of his conscience to do battle in the basement. The vacation that his buddy is returning from is his tour of duty...the "vacation" being a departure from the real world of everyday living. Perhaps I'm reading more here than I should, but its what I came away with. All in all, an interesting read. Thanks for sharing. "We'll chase them like rats across the tundra." |
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Prasad Nataraj Senior Member
since 2008-05-29
Posts 1149Bangalore,India |
lots of monster's in the basement for sure. Good read.  "Hardwork pays in the long run" |
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Namyh Senior Member
since 2009-01-20
Posts 988 |
Andrew – You read what you saw in it with honesty that counts. Our demons can come from anywhere, anyplace and anytime. We are human beings and we’re good at creating them as survival mechanisms enabling our species to survive for how long it has. Even though they wreak havoc on our psyche, the fear they generate keeps us alive. And when we no longer need that stimulus of fear, the problem then is how do we get rid of those demons. Thanks Andrew. Namyh |
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Namyh Senior Member
since 2009-01-20
Posts 988 |
Prasad – All monsters of the mind like the house they live in, attics, closets and basements especially. The problem is what if they’re not from the mind but from somewhere else! Whoa! Thanks for enjoying Prasad. Namyh |
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