»
Archives
»
Open Poetry #47
»
Look at Me
| Open Poetry #47 |
|
Look at Me |
|
|
JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana 
|
I'm only thirteen yet here I sit contemplating slipping into the cold, dark water look at me how has life beat me down at such an early age to give me these gloomy thoughts no one understands really they don't understand my parents don't they think they do but they have no idea maybe at some point in their life they understood no more they're more about "being all they can be" to take more than a second look at me look at me teachers that don't teach preachers that don't preach boyfriends who cheat girlfriends who let them my grandmother told me girls of thirteen used to not be allowed to date in her day maybe they had something back then now we have nurseries in school twelve-year-olds have babies look at me I'm going to be a mother or not thirteen-years-old I'm going to have a baby my goodness, I'm a baby myself look at me what to do abortion is not in the cards at the same time what will I do with a baby I know the government will take care of me and the baby I just can't do that I've not lived one mistake should not ruin my life so I sit on this pier thinking about solving everybody's problem and just slide into the water look at me ©March 5, 2011 / Jerry Pat Bolton ~ Never did I feel more devoted to my wife than after biting the wild garlic of treachery ~ [This message has been edited by JerryPat2 (03-05-2011 11:06 PM).] |
||
| © Copyright 2011 Jerry Pat Bolton - All Rights Reserved | |||
|
passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
wow, that's tough. And sad. A reality many face, including me all those years ago but sure glad I didn't slide in. |
||
|
JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
It appears you came out of it okay. That is good to hear. Many do not. Thank you, passing shadows. ~ Never did I feel more devoted to my wife than after biting the wild garlic of treachery ~ |
||
|
steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
you have such an uncanny ability to be so graphic with your words that when you paint a picture a reader like me might not wish to even think about, I find myself drawn to your canvass...excellent write on so many levels |
||
|
JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
After reading your comments, steavenr, I am doubly grateful that you chose to stop and read, and comment. I understand that I have a take no prisoners attitude when it come to writing poetry, and sometimes it is difficult to take. Thank you for your input. ~ Never did I feel more devoted to my wife than after biting the wild garlic of treachery ~ |
||
|
ethome Member Patricius
since 2000-05-14
Posts 11858New Brunswick Canada |
Whew, that's dark Jerry but oh so truthful. Makes one feel sad at the decline in the moral state of our society. Day care centers where people who don't really love children that don't belong to them are caring for them 8 - 10 hrs. a day. Parents come home exhausted and many don't spend the quality time needed with their children. Things like this poem of yours grow out of our society today. I can blame greedy mismanaged governments for a lot of it. Look at the cost of a gallon of gas. Great work Jerry! Eric true love never looks after it's own interests |
||
|
JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
I think there is a lot of blame to go around, Eric. So many people say where is the deadbeat father of the child. I'll tell you where he is, for the most part, alone just as she is. Just because he was capable of making a baby does not mean that he is capable of raising one. The answer lies in the "moral" category I feel. It used to be shameful for an unmarried girl/woman to become pregnant, but now it is actually looked upon in much the same way as coming down with the measles. ~ Never did I feel more devoted to my wife than after biting the wild garlic of treachery ~ |
||
|
Earth Angel Member Empyrean
since 2002-08-27
Posts 40215Realms of Light |
You truly got inside the skin of that 13 year-old pregnant girl. It is beyond me why some young teens think of it as a badge of honour. It's the 'in' thing to do in some communities. (I was recalling a town in New England where the girls planned to get pregnant). Then there are those young girls like the one one you so poignantly portrayed in your poem. It near brought tear to my eyes for all those who unwittingly find themselves in that position. A powerful write that evoked powerful emotions in this reader.  Linda |
||
|
JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
Hello, Linda, and thank you for giving me your thoughts about the poem. I remember the "planned" pregnancies. What a shame, but the news stories I saw about it the reporters were almost grabbing their hands and lifting them in the air in a major "win" move. Disgusting. I don't think we should brand girls with the letter "S" for slut when they get pregnant, but I do believe we need to teach them the consequences of their actions before the pregnancies can even occur. ~ Never did I feel more devoted to my wife than after biting the wild garlic of treachery ~ |
||
|
faithmairee Senior Member
since 2011-01-05
Posts 1441Poe Haven, USA |
this is a really sad well written poem...nice work, JerryPat There must be a poem in here somewhere. |
||
|
Lori Grosser Rhoden Member Patricius
since 2009-10-10
Posts 10202Fair to middlin' of nowhere |
Jerry you captured this so well I'm just relieved you didn't decide to take it in the direction of those girls who throw their newborns in the trash. Your gut wrenching abilities are powerful. Lori |
||
|
JerryPat2 Member Laureate
since 2011-02-06
Posts 16975South Louisiana |
Thank you Faith. I appreciate your kind words. Lori, I actually thought about taking it there, but decided against it. People already think I'm much too dark in my poetry. Thanks for being here. ~ I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die ~ |
||
|
|
⇧ top of page ⇧ |
|
| All times are ET (US). All dates are in Year-Month-Day format. | ||
