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Open Poetry #40
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Closet Lovers
| Open Poetry #40 |
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Closet Lovers |
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dingusjr Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 415Missouri |
They are like lovers, these two, always hanging around together. He a handsome brown, she a baby blue. He tells her funny stories, holds her close and whispers softly. She sighs and leans toward him leaving traces of perfume on his collar. She puts her hand in his pocket and smiles a seductive smile. Their lives are an endless stream of gentle hugs and close kisses. Unfortunately, they seldom go out together, these coats of brown and blue. Their owners have stopped speaking and sleep in seperate rooms, unaware of the closet love affair. |
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| © Copyright 2007 Larry W. Allen - All Rights Reserved | |||
Marge Tindal 
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Larry~ SO good to see you posting~ There is always something so REAL that touches through your thoughts~ Reminds me that Spring is just around the corner and I've got some brown/blues to hang in the sunshine~  How talented you are~ *Huglets*  ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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dingusjr Member
since 2003-09-24
Posts 415Missouri |
Thanks Marge. How do you like the removal of the line that tells you they are coats? Anyone else have an opinion? |
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Janette
since 2001-07-20
Posts 2843Chicagoland for now |
You got me ... ! " ... these coats of brown and blue ..." This piece intrigued me and definitely caught me by surprise. Enjoyed. always seeking joy, adventure and romance and wishing you find the same |
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passing shadows Member Empyrean
since 1999-08-26
Posts 45577displaced |
very creative |
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Marge Tindal
since 1999-11-06
Posts 42384Florida's Foreverly Shores |
Larry~ Effective !!! I had already 'gotten it' without being told~ Like I said ... that's what a good writer does ... and you did it so well~  *Huglets* ~*Marge*~ ~*The sound of a kiss is not as strong as that of a cannon, but it's echo endures much longer*~ |
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steavenr Member Elite
since 2003-11-17
Posts 4058 |
excellent write, you lead the reader well...enjoyed |
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Ratleader
since 2003-01-23
Posts 7026Visiting Earth on a Guest Pass |
I see them, I see them! ....and I feel them. The pathos of this is like a sneaky-fast pitcher....never throws ~hard~ but suddenly the ball's by you and you haven't even thought about swinging yet..... ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸¸¸ºº> ~~(¸¸ ¸¸ºº> ~~~(¸¸ER¸¸ºº> |
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aziza Member Elite
since 2006-07-09
Posts 2995Lumpy Oatmeal makes me Crazy! |
This is so wonderful - I like it with the coats and think it would work well without the line too. You have me wondering what is happening in my closet! A |
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