love like rain - pipTalk Forums

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hunnie_girl

Member Elite

since 2006-06-18

Posts 2567
Canada

0 posted 2006-09-18 10:04 PM

the rain is pouring down again,
missing where it's never been,
soaking what it's already seen,

love is a lot like the rain,
though the rain it comes and goes,
true love never knows,

but as always the sun comes up,
leaving a rainbow in it's spot,
and the sun on his face,
it's like you never faught.

A true friend is someone who reaches for your hand and touches your
heart.

rhia_5779
Senior Member

since 2006-06-09

Posts 1334
California

1 posted 2006-09-19 08:52 AM

amazing these two stanzas

the rain is pouring down again,
missing where it's never been,
soaking what it's already seen,

love is a lot like the rain,
though the rain it comes and goes,
true love never knows,

after that it kinda lost the strength and grace it had. try adding more to it and you might look at the last stanza again. very good stanza and wording but it lost what i loved about the first to. always ur choice though

*Alli4000*

Member Elite

since 2004-03-21

Posts 3188
The World of Poetry

2 posted 2006-09-19 06:52 PM

I enjoyed this poem! I just feel like it was a little short and wouldn't mind if you added some more stanzas on.

~Alli~

the_girl_next_door
Senior Member

since 2006-02-26

Posts 591
USA

3 posted 2006-09-20 10:43 PM

Omg.. This was amazing. I love the first stanza the most out of all of them. It's been a while since i've been on here.. but I miss reading everyone's poetry. this was great

heather

Desire nothing except desirelessness. Hope for nothing except to rise above all hopes.
Want nothing & you will have everything.

~Jonnybalze223~
New Member

since 2006-09-19

Posts 5

4 posted 2006-09-20 10:54 PM

I dont get why people are trying to give advise to someones poem.... a poem is not something you adjust... most of the time. Most of the time it comes from the heart and only the writer really knows what it truely means. so why add more i dont think you should do anything to it, it sounds perfect like you have it were you want it, Its not about what other people think, this isnt a competitive forum is it. appling advice in certain situations is ok but not when something comes from the heart..... so let this poem warm your heart and leave it at that.

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